Just like every Arsenal fan that always get fooled that the team is going to win the league during the beginning of the football season, I was fooled when I realized that I had an affection towards this lady. The affection was so strong that I couldn’t keep it to myself anymore and I had to confess to her that I’m having deep feelings for her. But she told me she was not ready to be in any relationship because she has just been out of a relationship very recently. So I waited for her to be ready. I actually met her on a BBM social platform where we became friends around June, 2016.
So one day around August, 2016 she sent a message to me on Whatsapp and said she really appreciates my friendship with her and she would want me to move on without her. When I read the text I was really pained and disappointed, so I made sure I deleted her cell number from my phone and deleted anything that will remind me of her or will possibly link me up with her again.
So I moved on with my life and continue my search for work to do. Around late October, 2016, I received a message from her on IMO, I was so surprised that she still remembers me even though we have not met in person before. From there on, we chatted and call each other on phone almost everyday. Not quite long, I realized that my feelings for this lady has not been totally erased from my heart, so I made sure I kept these feelings to myself for about one month in order to be sure if it was real or fake. When I told her about it, she said she only want us to be friends without any romantic feelings. But my feelings for her can’t just be waved away as if nothing happens. We called each other and I’ve been planning to see her whenever I come Lagos where she stays. I’ve already has the feelings that she’s the right woman for me, I even told some of my friends and family members about her. So, around last month, I told her I want to know her decision concerning my proposal to her and that I will respect her decision no matter what it maybe whether YES or NO. On Monday, if I can remember vividly, she sent a message to me that she doesn’t want to give me hope that she’s interested in me and doesn’t want to deceive me in any way, but she wishes that we are still going to be good friends, I was really pained and disappointed but I need to move on and respect her decision. I told her that I will still be a good friend to her and if she needs anything from me she shouldn’t hesitate to contact me.
Honestly, it was not easy for me to take rejection but I have to learn that no matter how much I tried to fight for her love, it would be in vain. And also got to know that God take away the good to give us the best, that I’m also going to meet a woman that will love and appreciate me as her man. All I just need is to be patient and allow God to work.
To be honest with you, I don’t think I will love her the way I did if she comes back and tells me she’s in love with me. Why? Because I’ve already moved on without her in my life. She’s still my friend but my relationship with her can never be like before. I’ve already broken my soulties with her. So, I’m patiently waiting for the right woman without being in such a hurry to get hooked up with any lady again. I also learned that our feelings can sometimes fool us into errors, we just need to submit to God’s will and plan for us when it comes to marriage.
I really do hope you can learn from my personal experience. I will be so glad to hear your feedback and correction.
Thanks and God bless you!!
Akinkuades Oluwadare Tobi 2017©